A Enormous" Feeling" of Disconnection

I have been wanting to get here to write this and some how it seems as if My fingers could not type a word. What seems like an oak tree is not.. That is what I feel like,. I have returned from afar and when I have I came back with extreme fatigue and can barely function. I am able to connect to my higher self and higher places, but when it comes to be here on this earth plane it feels down right exhausting and as if I want to shut the doors and hide in a connective state of being. I flew to New York for a few days on that journey there was many layers of density burning off I have no Idea from the get go at least I consciously do not.. What a trip to see old patterns old ways of living I revisted the past and the path and it is almost like a road that has nothing left to it almost completely washed away. I guess it was where it all began and it needed to be re-visted once again to let go fo anything that was holding on.

Tears and smiles and happy things to share with alot of past elements that really have been an illusion all along. The people you once knew to be a certain way are no longer exisiting the way you once saw them. There are complicated states that have not seen any way out just to belong and stay in control of what they feel they need too. I cannot go in and show them the way only live the way.I have decided to relinguish the situations that have impacted me to the point of making changes to see them in a new way and not to make a new but to live a new.

I have searched around for some confirmation of what is happening right now and have seen absoutely nothing.. I have searched ahigh and low and seen nothing You know why it is upto me to "KNOW" what is happening and why I feel this way and why it seems to happen when I can feel the change going on and yet still need to look for someone else to say it and tell me. I can tell anyone that asks me what is happening and it takes no effort for me to tap into and realise for them. But, when it comes to me it's like I have information for others but not me. Even though that is not true..
This shift or change is the biggest one I have ever felt and it is swirling around and shifting stretching and impacting everything from one state of being to another. This is making you really awake to the second comming within our soul. If you are a person who does not believe and does nto know what is happening hang on to your shorts,, You will know something very shortlya nd make no mistake it will be life altering... In what ever way you decide to have it show up. I am applying to spirit as a light worker of truth and would like to settle in and become apart of a larger team to be able to spread light in a wave. no longer one by one.
I feel we should be able to show our rewards now.